Motherhood

Since I came back from India, I have been busy catching up with work and  family. With  the  New Year, there have been changes to my daughter's schooling schedule. Motherhood, as with every other role we assume in life, is what we make of it. I have met the most dedicated of mothers and also those who take it rather matter of factly. There is no right or wrong approach to parenting. It is a matter of priorities and choices. We reap what we sow.

I took a break in my career to bring up my daughter when she was born. It was a decision that took my ex-colleagues and friends by surprise. I think it was a choice that went against the grain of normal expectations. My closest friends understood but some others questioned how I could give up my potential earnings and a promising career. If you look at it solely from the financial perspective, what they say is true. Maybe, I am not that wise about money though I am a trained accountant.

Early childhood is the most intensive period of brain development during the lifespan. Recent research confirms that the first five years are particularly important for the development of the child's brain, and the first three years are the most critical in shaping the child's brain architecture. Children learn more quickly during their early years than at any other time in life. They need love and nurturing to develop a sense of trust and security that turns into confidence as they grow. Babies and young children grow, learn and develop rapidly when they receive love and affection, attention, encouragement and mental stimulation, as well as nutritious meals and good health care.

I wanted  to be closely involved in my child's development at this time. Thus, choices had to be made. We cannot always have the cake and eat it too. Something has got to give. It was not easy to survive as a single income family so we cut back on luxuries. I did not have a maid and coped on my own. I found it challenging because I really had no idea how to be a good mother. People usually consciously or unconsciously parent in the same way as their parents or if they have had  unhappy experiences, compensate for it by doing the opposite of their parents. Like many modern parents, I read up on parenting when I became pregnant.

The years spent staying home, nurturing my daughter have been the most treasured years of my life.  I have watched her develop from milestone to milestone with much pride. Motherhood is by far, the more satisfying and fulfulling job. It is a lifelong commitment and responsibility being a parent. It is a tiring, difficult, rewarding, beautiful process and I regard it a gift to have a hand in shaping the life of another human being. A gift that could so easily be taken for granted.

There are more and more women, some highly educated who have opted to be stay-at-home mothers. Besides this, there are others who have taken career breaks to attend to their parents, family or their health matters. I understand their challenges and sacrifices and I support their courage and foresight. Life is more than just about earnings, it is also about living, sharing, giving and forging bonds.